(Subtitle: “Banach-Tarski! Banach-Tarski! Why isn’t this thing working?”)
Also amusing this long after the fact: this is what the police report describes as “moderate damage to the frame”.
Also relevant: this, although the mangled sound track makes me want to do violence to the current state of copyright law that doubtless makes it hard to find an unaltered copy.
* I don’t really know that it can’t be repaired. Although when I was walking back from retrieving the bike from the Palo Alto police, I stopped by Palo Alto Bicycles just for giggles to ask if it would need a new frame. I’ll give you one guess at the answer. I’m unsure exactly what I’m going to do with the bike, or to replace it, just yet.